worklife balance – Schpilkes The Blog

Short-Staffed and Suds-Obsessed

There is a saying that in life there are no second chances. Luckily, in soap, there are.

I started making soap not so long ago. I never intended to be one of those “crafty” people who makes their own lotions at home; I became one of these soap people quite by accident.

For the last eight months, I’ve worked 12–14 days in a row without a break. Between extreme timelines, a gazillion events, and being short-staffed, I was working with no tomorrow, no extra pay, and no vacation time. I burned out. I was overly stressed and ready to quit without a second thought.

Around that time, a friend hosted a Galentine’s decoupage party. Newsflash: I hate decoupage. Peeling napkins, cutting tiny shapes, and gluing them onto things only made me more annoyed. But that’s when I realized I needed a hobby—something to relax and center me again.

I tried several things, including soap making. I bought a simple kit online and my first attempt was a complete failure. Yet, something in the process made me want to try again. It might have been my brain remembering the chemistry set my parents gave me as a teenager—a set I absolutely loved.

I was hooked. It created a monster.

Now, I’m constantly trying new scents, watching tutorials, and finding creative ways to make beautiful bars. I even keep a notebook next to my bed in case an idea strikes in the middle of the night. I’m by no means an expert, but I am enjoying every moment of the process—even the failures.

With soap, if it doesn’t come out the way you wanted the first time, you get that second chance. You just melt it down and try to create something new and improved.

It might be true that in life there are no second chances—but what if, like soap, we just need to be willing to melt things down and start over?

Redefining Useful

One of my new year resolutions was to strive to do something useful every day. I did not define “useful” on purpose; I decided that useful would be anything that deemed useful to me.

Over the last three or four weeks, I did do a couple of useful things. I took a vacation. I swam with manta rays and snorkeled in the Bahamas. I organized one shelf of my yoga pants. And today, I watered the garden.

To some, all of this might seem menial and not really useful, but to my overwhelmed brain, every one of these things was useful.

My brain has been in overdrive for the last couple of months — family health issues, work, and everyday life. Sleep has not been good, and worry took over.

So taking some time off has been useful, including “just” watering the patio today.

Make your own useful to-do lists. Make sure they work for you. And take mental days as well — trust me, they are useful.

26 Pairs of Yoga Pants and a Forced Vacation

There is nothing more fun than getting sick on vacation. Unfortunately, this is not the first time—and probably not the last.

When we went to China, pre-COVID, I came back with a nasty respiratory infection that took three months and antibiotics to clear. In Thailand, again pre-COVID, I had a terrible case of vertigo that completely threw me off. In Hawaii, two months before COVID, I came back with severe bronchitis and almost broke a rib from coughing. And this pattern has just continued through the years.

I am now on a forced vacation. Our workplace goes through a shutdown during the December holidays, and once again, my lungs are not happy. Interestingly, all my symptoms started after getting a flu shot. Coincidence? Maybe.

I had many plans for this shutdown: tidying my home office, planning ahead for 2026 for my side hustles, and going through my closet to donate all the clothes I no longer like or haven’t worn in ages.

Instead, I sat with a cup of tea, a tissue in hand, and felt miserable. Today, I felt a little better and managed to go through one shelf. To my great surprise, I discovered I own 26 pairs of yoga pants. When I told my friend, she asked, “Do you wear them all?”

Of course not, I replied. I wear the same four pairs that are always on top. So six pairs went into the donation pile, three pairs with holes went straight into the trash—without a proper Marie Kondo goodbye. It’s not a lot, but I’m celebrating this small win.

Am I upset that I got sick? Yes. But it did force me to rest and to pause. I watched silly TV shows, videos of my favorite—Nate the Hoof Guy—and took naps. In a way, it gave me permission to slow down.

I still have a couple more days off, and who knows what I’ll accomplish—if anything. And that’s absolutely okay.

Choosing Purpose Over Pay

I choose to live my life with purpose and joy—and that choice extends to my work.

I worked eleven days in a row again—not by choice, but by necessity. Part of it was for my division, and part of it was for our parent company.

As my direct boss kept pointing out, “You’re not getting paid extra for this—why are you doing it?”

I’m an exempt employee, so in reality, it doesn’t matter how much I work. I could work two hours or twenty-four in a day, and my salary would stay the same. Maybe my bonus will be bigger, but I don’t have high hopes for that.

Yes, I wasn’t paid extra for this assignment. But I’m at a stage in my life—and my career—where I care deeply about having interest in what I do. I outgrew my current job years ago and chose to stay because it gives me flexibility. That flexibility allows me to take care of my two other loves (besides my husband and kids): my dog and my Pilates class. It also gives me the freedom to manage my side hustles.

When my boss mentioned—again—that I shouldn’t be working for another division because I wasn’t getting paid, I was taken aback. It wasn’t the response I expected, especially from someone in management.

I later told my husband how everything went down, and he pointed out that her reaction reflected her perspective, likely shaped by her own issues with management, and was not a reflection of my actions.

He was right, of course. I might even tell him that one day.

In the meantime, I’ll continue carving my own path at work—choosing projects that bring me joy and fulfillment—until the day I decide to retire and turn my side hustles into my full-time focus.

Still on the Road: From Minivans to Empty Nest Adventures

Still on the Road: From Minivans to Empty Nest Adventures

We always took road trips with the kids. Every other year, we’d pack the car to the brim and just go—no rigid plans, just the open road and a map. Over the years, we explored the entire West Coast of the USA this way, stopping at national parks and hidden gems along the route.

The kids would argue, bicker, and sometimes make us question whether they were enjoying any of it. But deep down, we knew—we were creating memories.

Back then, we drove a trusty minivan. The girls took the second-row captain’s seats, while our son (now a six-foot-two adult) claimed the back row, stretching his legs all the way to the front and occasionally sticking them in his sisters’ faces—just for laughs, of course.

We even did a two-week road trip across Canada. We really did travel a lot, and on a limited budget. With one income, three kids, a dog, and lots of coupons and budgeting tricks, car trips were simply the most economical—and the most memorable.

These past few years, the kids have grown up, started jobs, and moved on with their own lives. And yet, my husband and I are still hitting the road—just the two of us. No more minivan, now it’s an SUV. We pick an area, pack the car, and go.

This year was a little harder to plan. Our daughter got married. My husband went on a two-week biking trip across Europe with our son, which made his vacation time limited. I, on the other hand, had the opposite problem—plenty of unused vacation days and no one to go with.

After some back and forth—debating between a cruise, an all-inclusive resort, or another road trip—we chose the road. It’s funny, really. We don’t have the same financial limitations anymore, but we still picked the simplest option.

The truth is, we just love road trips. For us, it’s a time to reconnect. We talk, laugh, and reflect. Not every conversation is deep or exciting—401(k)s and investments come up, and I admit I tune some of those out—but even the silences are meaningful.

I used to worry about what would happen once the kids left. Would we run out of things to say? But lucky for us, we’re still discovering new things to talk about—even if we don’t always agree.

I hope we’ve passed on to our kids a love of adventure, and the understanding that no matter your stage of life, seeing new places is always worth it—with kids, or without.

What’s your favorite road trip memory?

“Apparently, ‘I’ Is a Problem”

This past week, I was reprimanded at work—verbally, of course. They never put anything in writing.

No, I didn’t do anything outrageous. I sent an email about IT problems in the office. Since the IT guy was scheduled to stop by, I wrote that I needed something fixed.

The horror. Apparently, writing “I need” instead of “we need” is a big enough deal to warrant a call from my boss.

To clarify: the IT problems were specific to me. I was the one whose internet wasn’t working. I was the one using my personal hotspot and personal cell phone to get work done.

Still, my boss looked me in the eye and told me it was inappropriate to write “I.” I asked if she was serious. She was.

But wait—there’s more.

Last month, I got pulled aside because “someone” heard me say I had maxed out my vacation days and needed to start using them. That was apparently gossip-worthy.

This is a pattern. I keep getting spoken to—always verbally, never formally—about things “someone” heard me say.

What’s strange is that this is not a terrible place to work. Most people are kind, helpful, and just trying to do their jobs. But management? That’s another story.

Ironically, my annual review was glowing, and my bonus was great. So, clearly, I’m doing something right. Right?

We even did harassment training earlier this year. It had a section on bullying and toxic behavior. I guess some folks in management skipped that part.

Let me be clear:

Is this nitpicking? Yes.
Is it creating a culture of fear and second-guessing? Absolutely.
Is it starting to feel toxic? More and more.
Am I being targeted? It really feels like it.
Why? I honestly have no idea.

This is a private, family-owned company. I’m not a threat. I’m not gunning for anyone’s job. I just want to do my work, collect my paycheck, and go home to my dog.

When my boss called me about the email, I said what I’ve been thinking: “This feels like harassment.” I asked that future complaints be formal and in writing.

Not holding my breath on that one.

So now I’m wondering:
Do I just show up this week and wait for whatever “someone” says next?
Do I say nothing?
Do I start documenting everything and protect myself?

I don’t know the answer yet. But I do know this: I’m not crazy. And I’m not alone.

No One Gave Me a Dragon

I woke up with a panic attack at 1 a.m. last night. It took me three hours to calm down and fall asleep again. Needless to say, I’m exhausted this morning.
My husband asked me what was bothering me, and it took me a while to figure it out. I had to retrace all my steps from the day before. Eventually, I remembered a conversation I had with a coworker—we were talking about that odd feeling you get when you return to work after a long vacation.
I told him that ever since my husband started his new job, he no longer experiences that “back to work” anxiety. For those of us who dread Monday even after a regular weekend, that kind of peace feels like a distant dream.
My husband was laid off at the beginning of 2024 from one of those massive high-tech companies. It was the kind of job that felt like it would never end—6 a.m. and 10 p.m. meetings with overseas teams, constant Slack pings, nonstop reporting. He didn’t like it, even though the pay was great. Honestly, he was pretty unhappy.
When the layoffs began, they crept closer and closer to his division—until they finally reached him.
It took some time, but he eventually found a new job. It doesn’t come with high-tech pay, but it does come with something better: boundaries. Normal working hours. The ability to mentally switch from work mode to home mode.
He recently returned from a ten-day bike trip in Europe with our son—and went back to work without any stress or anxiety. It’s really nice to see him like this.
Unfortunately, that’s not how things feel for me.
Some days, my work feels like a Game of Thrones episode—but no one is giving me a dragon. And honestly, I really want a dragon.
Office politics aren’t my favorite. Working with toxic coworkers? Even less so. But the worst part is waking up in the middle of the night with a work-related panic attack.
I don’t have the answers yet about what comes next. I need time to think. I’ll figure it out eventually—dragon or no dragon.

#WorkAnxiety #BurnoutIsReal #MentalHealthMatters #WorkLifeBalance #BlogPost #GameOfThronesMood

You Found My Blog. Here’s What I Think

I write because I love writing, I always did. It is a great hobby that you can take anywhere with you. All I need is a piece of paper and a writing utensil. When I have inspiration you can find my writings on napkins, sticky notes and scribbles everywhere and wherever I am.

I am also a shy introvert, at least this is how I see myself. So all my social media is under a pseudonym not because I am hiding my identity but because I am shy and I value my privacy.

My dogs have a great tik tok and instagram and my public tiktok and instagram are ok as well, both of them do not even have any postings with my face or my name, again I am an introvert who lives her public persona through her dogs and blog.

I post about what I feel like and I write about what I want to or care about, family life, dogs, food, travel and work, yes work. I was told at work recently that corporate did not appreciate one of my blog posts. I found that interesting as I never ever mention where I work and even on my professional work related social media it does not name any of my work places.

They did not dispute what I wrote, but rather did not appreciate it. I typically do not write about anything that I have not written in the employee surveys and yet in those I was ignored. But someone had some spare time on their hands and found a blog that does not mention them or references them in any way on a social media platform that does not even have my name on.

After that first thought the second thought was – is this a veil threat? I do not like to be threatened and I do not like to be censored so I asked and was told no. But still the message that I got was just to know we follow your writing so in actuality it is a threat even if it was not meant that way.

This all goes back to what message you are giving your employees, the message I got was not positive and left a bad taste in my mouth. So if it was meant to be different it was surely handled wrong.

And I will continue writing about what I want, and if I write about my place of employment I promise to not to use its name and hopefully they will not provide me with anything major to write about. However, this is a free country.

So my message to corporate- Since you know who I am, you can always call me. I will be happy to tell you in person what I think and I am always happy to help and you are welcome to use my talents. I appreciate you reading my blog, I earned a big amount of twenty five cents from you going there and am closer to drinking a lava flow on a tropical beach. Feel free to add some likes or comments and for heaven’s sake finally fix the air conditioner.

#CorporateLife #WorkThoughts #RealTalk #OfficePolitics #FreeSpeech
#RespectWriters #VoiceMatters

They Found Me. My Dog’s Still Free.

I recently had to change a picture on my blog—not because of copyright issues, but for privacy reasons.

It was an old photo of me, one I really liked. It showed my face clearly, and it was a genuinely good picture. But the thing is, I’m a private and somewhat shy person. I work in a customer service role, and most of our customers live in the same area I do. That means I often run into them—at the gym, the grocery store, out walking the dogs, or even at dinner.

I try to stay as under-the-radar as possible: hat, sunglasses, sitting in the back, and minding my own business. Still, people have stopped me in public before to ask work-related questions. I usually manage to steer the conversation away, but there was one time a parent stopped me in the feminine product aisle at Target, with her teenage son, to ask me about work. My daughter, a teen at the time, and the boy were both so mortified that it was honestly kind of hilarious.

Recently, my anonymous pseudonym somehow ended up on corporate’s radar—again. There’s no mention of my name, employer, or location on the blog, but corporate still managed to find it. They didn’t like what I wrote. Ironically, they didn’t dispute anything I said; they just wanted me to know they were watching.

So this past weekend turned into a whirlwind of blocking people on social media, locking down my LinkedIn (which doesn’t even list my employer), and generally trying to cut off access to “Big Brother.” Unfortunately, that meant taking down the really good picture of myself, too.

The silver lining? My dog’s profile is still public.

#DigitalPrivacy #OnlineAnonymity #PrivacyMatters #LivingIncognito #BoundariesMatter #OfflineIsOkay #WorkLifeBalance #CorporateCulture
#OutsideOfOfficeHours#NotAtWork#FoundByCorporate#LifeBeyondWor#BlogLife
#WriterLife#PersonalBlog#RealTalk#WritingThroughIt#TrueStory

Why Are We Racing Through Life?

This morning, I caught myself sprinting—not toward a meeting or deadline, but toward my favorite reformer at Pilates.

It wasn’t about being late. It was about being first. Someone else who likes the same reformer had just parked, and instinctively, I rushed.

Why? Because the AC is over that spot, and it’s next to a wall—my non-working ear faces it, so the silence suits me. Logically, I know the workout would be the same anywhere in the room. But emotionally? I needed to win that micro-race.

It made me think: how often do we do this?

We weave through traffic just to stop at the same red light. We rush to checkout lines. We race—not because we have to, but because we feel like we must.

Most of us aren’t race car drivers or Olympic sprinters. So why do we move through the world like we are?

As I grow older, I’m starting to question the value of being first. Maybe it’s not about where you end up in line—but about showing up at all. And getting home safely.

That’s the real win.

Curious if anyone else feels this way—have you caught yourself racing for no real reason?

#Mindfulness #PersonalDevelopment #Productivity #Leadership #WorkLifeBalance