Category: Uncategorized

Keeping meetings on track

Today is what I call meeting  Thursday day,  our first monthly all staff meeting of the new year.  I hate meetings.It’s not that I don’t like meeting, I really dislike big all hand meetings. They usually drag on forever or what seems like forever. There is always someone who likes to hear their voice more than actually listen and collaborate and quite frankly they are usually boring after the first 5 minutes.  If we are home on zoom at least we can do something when we lose focus but what can you do when forced to sit in an actual meeting where we can’t hide. Maybe there is something positive for zoom meetings after all.

Thankfully the meeting was on zoom, however I had to present and lead part of it which meant I actually had to  pay attention.  So when we planned this meeting to avoid all the issues  I hate about meetings we decided on parameters- we limited the meeting time to a max of one hour. This forced us to focus on the most important issues and not to wander off. We also decided on the topics ahead of time and put everything in clear bullet points on a shared screen so everyone can see and for us not to lose focus and if we did then one of the meeting leaders would steer everything back on the right track. And the most important for the meeting leaders, we did it just before lunch and made sure to be hungry so we will finish in a timely manner  and we were conscious of other people’s lunch time. I know this might seem weird when planning meetings, but we found that this  helps us with keeping meetings on point. I am not advocating for anyone to go to meetings hungry, I love food, but this is a method that works for us and I am sure everyone has their own guidelines for keeping meetings effective, that is unless they love meetings or the sound of their own voice.

Tales from the left ear January 2023

Just because some of us are different does not make us worse than someone else. There are stigmas for being hearing impaired, we are old, we are mentally challenged, we are not as intelligent and we have selective hearing and these are just some of them. 

Hearing aids come in ugly colors, there are no fun ones probably because the manufacturers think that we want to hide them as well. My hairdresser asked if she needed to cut my hair so no one would see them. I don’t hide my hearing aids, I love my hearing aids as they allow me to function but I do wish they were blue or sparkly purple. I dont hide them at all and wear a ponytail most of the time.  I don’t hide my hearing aid but it is not obvious to the general public as mine are small. So when I talk to new people I explain my hearing aids and that you need to look at me when you speak. 

Sometimes people are weird, I had a person then go to my ear and yell straight in my ear, needless to say that this hurt like hell and most likely I will not interact willingly with that person again. The other response I usually get is how did I lose my hearing and when I explain that a virus attacked my ear, they seem to back away thinking this is infectious. Of course I have those who just tell me how sorry they are for me. Again people are weird. People tell me I am very well adjusted for someone with this loss, but then again I am an eternal optimist although even I have my good and bad days.

I am different, I am not better or worse, just different!

The 3rd week of rain

I woke up this morning to a Supertramp song, It’s raining again, playing in my brain. And yes, I am aware that this song dates me but it is a good song and it fits the weather this morning and my general mood for the last three weeks of rain we have been having in California. The rain has not stopped and it seems like it has really been raining forever. I have complained about the rain before, but as an old lady I see that as my prerogative!

Some of us love the rain, some of us like the rain and some like me just tolerate the rain. I have heard of weirdos who move to cold rainy places on purpose as they love it. Those places for me are the kiss of death, I get S.A.D. (seasonal affective disorder) from one cloudy day. So the last three weeks have not been enjoyable for me or my dog. My dog is a British dog, but her upbringing in California ruined the love  of cloudy rainy days. 

Even Sagey girl (the dog) refuses to go out to take care of business, my girl who loves long walks prefers to sleep on the sofa, bark at the squirrels from inside the house and keeps the walkies to a minimum. It makes me wonder if she is affected by my general mood as she usually is very sensitive.  I have had her since she was 8 weeks old and as I worked from home before, she was my home office dog. 

The rain is supposed to stop this afternoon, and we are promised a couple of days of sun which I know I need even if it will be cold, California cold, not real cold. And maybe  my sunny outlook will return, but who knows.  The only thing I know for sure is that I miss the sun!

Starting the cleaning process

Our garage has been a mess since the great downstairs flood of 2019. We had a pipe leak that destroyed the first floor of the house and raised our standard of living as we were relegated to only using our 2nd floor.  And as much as we enjoyed the “open concept” living of our first floor which included  open walls everywhere, we were very excited the fixing up was completed just before the pandemic started we had the stay at home orders.

The only thing that we have not gotten to organize was the garage, during the remodel we moved all our furniture and belongings to the garage. When we started to put the house back together we brought only the most important things back and  donated a lot of household items since  who really  needs 20 serving platters.

But for some reason  we never cleared the garage completely and instead of using the garage for the two cars like it was intended, the garage has become a one car garage with a side full of stuff we have not organized yet and have no memory of what is in the boxes anymore.

I promised my husband for the last three years  that as soon as the California heat dies down I will start Marie Konding the garage, unfortunately or fortunately I have been using the same excuse for the last three years as well as why I never got to clean it.

Truthfully, there is so much stuff there that it is overwhelming and I could never  figure out where to start, so today my son and I decided to tackle two boxes. He helped me primarily cause he was looking for the weights we haven’t seen in ages, but I did not care what the reason was I just jumped in and said let’s start.

We succeeded  kinda, we cleaned 3 boxes and filled the trash cans with trash and there is a little more room in our packed garage. I see this as an accomplishment! And as I decided that from now on I will celebrate any accomplishment, big, small or tiny, I will be celebrating this one and maybe I will be inspired to actually complete  this cleaning project (I would have added pictures, but that would be really embarrassing).

Being Rude to Customer Service People

There is an expression that goes something along the lines of – you get more flies with honey than vinegar. I am in the customer service business and about a quarter of my time I am customer facing. I  am always very surprised when people start yelling or are rude to us in the customer service industry.

It seems that it even got worse after the stay at home orders were lifted. People come in and immediately are rude and disrespectful. Yelling, raising their tones and thinking that will get them a better deal, a discount or just better service. Truthfully, I never understood that point of view.

You are supposed to treat people nicely, from my own experience, if you are nice you will be treated nicely back.  And from my point of view, if you are nasty to me there is no way on earth I will go above and beyond to help you no matter how big a bully you are. I had a customer come in yesterday and they requested something that does not exist anymore, we tried to explain that it does not exist anymore and we got yelled at, her tone was raised and she became more and more loud. Other customers in the office were looking at her as she continued to yell .

What this customer forgot besides that being an ass hole does not really make people want to help you  was that some of us live in the same community we work at, that means you will see me at Target, Costco and Pilates class. There is also a chance that you or your spouse work in something related to what my spouse is doing or to one of my many connections.

People think that just because some of us work in customer service we are uneducated, not connected and not worth being treated politely and thus show their true color. Those who I work with all have masters degrees and chose our industry for various reasons, they are all very smart and educated but even if they were not being rude to them is still no excuse.

Now, when I encounter these ass holes around town, I always look at them directly and smile. It is nice to see how uncomfortable they are once they realize who I am , but it would have been better if they actually behaved like nice human beings in the first place.

Hearing Aids Cost

My left ear has gotten a new hearing aid, I love the new aid. Everything is clearer, it is water proof so I don’t have to panic when I enter the shower or be afraid to walk in the rain anymore. Or even take them off at the beach or pool and not be able to communicate with others while at the beach.

My last couple of vacations were not as easy ever since I lost my hearing. At the beach or the pool, I took the hearing aids off and was disconnected from the world around me. When we went on a boat ride I was so worried they would get wet that I didn’t wear them at all and made sure to put them in a waterproof bag. 

I am glad technology finally caught up and people with hearing loss can function better now in more situations, but the cost of this catching up is a lot. These hearing aids are expensive and insurance companies cover a fraction if they cover anything at all. We are talking between $3000 to $5000 and these aids need to be replaced every couple of years. This is not an expense that is trivial. A friend asked me a while ago what did my husband get me for our anniversary and my reply was new hearing aids.

Unfortunately those with moderate to severe hearing loss can not use the over the counter cheaper aids so that is not a solution. Costco has a nice selection of hearing aids but not from all the companies and not for all the devices available. 

 I believe that just like pre existing conditions were  outlawed from being denied insurance coverage, there needs to be a movement to add hearing aid coverage to regular insurance.  

When you finally have weather

We have been having some weird weather in california lately, we actually are experiencing a winter. I know, shocking! I guess this is payback for the great weather we had on Christmas day when the rest of the country was freezing. I knew  posting those short sleeve pictures will come back to haunt us.

Yes, we need the rain as we have had a drought for the last couple of years. But as we were on  day10th of the rain with no end in sight it really was starting to affect my doggy and me. I am originally from a country with cold winters and extremely hot and humid summers, so living in California for me is great. It’s either t-shirt weather or t -shirt with a cardigan weather. I do have some rain coats but their primary purpose is to look cute.

I was starting to get Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), this is common in places where sunlight is limited, places with real winter and not so much in California where we have lots and lots of sun and natural vitamin D. Even if it was real or perceived, so much rain and clouds is not good for my mental health plus I really hate being cold.

I keep thinking about Dr Suess -The cat in the hat. I wonder if he had the same dreary days that we were having. The sun does not shine and it’s definitely too wet to play, but as opposed to him I am not writing a book about it, I am just complaining about the rain!

We got sun yesterday and the next couple of days as well, so for now I am just going to enjoy it!

.

The going back to work positivity

I really enjoyed my last two weeks off work, it was nice not to return emails or answer phone calls, no meetings, training sessions or work to do lists. I thought I would be bored but I wasn’t. 

I read a couple of books, binged shows on Netflix, and had meals with friends. 

But even though this was a great mental break for me, I am still happy to go back to the office today , not because I miss the work but because I miss the people I work with. I miss my team!

I have a great team. Some unfortunate weeks  we spend more time together at the office than with our families at home, so naturally we are close to each other.

Most of us are immigrants and have shared experiences as strangers in a strange land (yes, I love the book), moving to the USA  without our families and reinventing ourselves in a foreign country. We make sure we all have breaks, make sure that the workaholics among us stop to eat and cover for each other when an emergency happens. So yes, your work is not your family but there is something different about a group that really cares about each other. And no, we are not all women, we are a mix of men, women, younger and older who come from different backgrounds and are in different stages of family lives and careers.

Not everyone has this experience with their work colleagues, I believe I am quite lucky. I worked with teams and bosses before that were just terrible and Sunday night was filled with agony about going back to work on Monday. The question is why is this team different?

It is different because our supervisor built this team from scratch and when she chose team members  added people that are positive and can contribute to the team.  She surrounded herself with team players who are good at what they do and there was no fear of overshadowing herself. This  leadership played an excellent role in building a great team that most of us are happy to be part of. 

So yes, I am happy to go to work today and see my team.

My support group

I had a fun day today, I finally had a fun day with my close friends. We  drove to the  big city, had a great brunch and had a great time all around. But the best time we had was not at brunch or sightseeing, it was actually when we were stuck in a traffic jam for two hours.

For two hours we spoke honestly and openly and it was great, most importantly we actually listened to each other without judgment. We figured out we haven’t had time together like this in a couple of years. Before the pandemic we traveled together and saw each other  frequently, but somewhere during the pandemic we didn’t get together as much as we could and when we did it was  with our spouses and families as this was our covid bubble.

I didn’t realize how much I needed our girl time until today. We tend to forget how much we need our close friends and the emotional support we provide them and they provide us. They say that those with close friends have healthier and better lives. These amazing women are the ones that when they see I can’t figure out what the conversation is around me (I have severe hearing loss) tell me what’s going on and make sure that with all my food allergies I have something to eat. These women were my support when I lost my hearing, broke my foot and were my support through all my other mishaps and I am happy they are in my life.

I came home with renewed  energy and the feeling that with their support I can handle anything else the universe throws my way. 

Your Commitment to Yourself

It’s the last two days of the year and my feed and email is all flooded with New Year resolutions, ads for sport equipment and organization hacks. However, nothing about taking care of yourself and your mental health in the upcoming year.

Granted having an organized house or exercising does help you mentally but these are side effects and not a purpose. Not only that, what will happen when we stop going to the gym or when we realize our house is still messy and none of our goals, achievable or not, have been met?

Instead I propose we commit to take care of our mental health and put ourselves first. The disorganized closet can wait as can the resolution to go to the gym every day. But if for some reason orgnization is your mental health path, by all means commit to it, Marie Kondo your house!

Our goals need to be goals that will not only not set us up for failure but will help us grow and find our inner peace what ever works for you. You might need to take time to see figure out the path to your mental health, so commit to discovering it. Commit to doing something that will make you happy once a week, take an art class, read 10 books during the year, choose some fun activity outside the house, learn macrame or anything that brings you joy and find your purpose.

I am committing to myself to have lunch or dinner with my friends at least twice a month, I will read a book or two each month and yes, I will also continue going to the gym as for me exercising does help my mental state and yes I will have a date breakfast or date night with my spouse at least once a week.