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Confessions of a 58 year old pirate!

At the ripe old age of 58, I finally achieved my goal of becoming a pirate. Not the sea-faring, world-traveling kind. Not the eye-patch version — my eyesight is still fine. Not the wooden-leg type either, although I did break my leg a couple of years ago. No, I’m the scurvy kind. Yes. Apparently my…

I Do Not Hear, and He Does Not Listen

A deeply personal essay about sudden hearing loss, marriage, and the invisible gap between sound and understanding. I like to say that my left ear is for decorative purposes only. It holds my glasses and I can put beautiful jewelry in it — beyond that, nothing more. I simply have no other use for it.…

Fear, Manta Rays, and a Bathing Suit

A journey from fear to fun in a one-piece Like many women my age—and honestly, women in general—I have a fear of a particular article of clothing in my closet: the bathing suit. Last month I went on vacation to the Caribbean. A vacation that involved pools, snorkeling, diving with manta rays, and—unfortunately—a bathing suit.…

Sobriety Checkpoints and the Curse of an Honest Face

I was stopped at a sobriety checkpoint last night on my way home from an office party. The officer asked where I was coming from and whether I’d been drinking. I said no. He looked at my face for a beat, smiled, and said, “I believe you. You can go.” I hadn’t been drinking. I…

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About Me

All my life I was told that i have schpilkes, I’m in a constant state of of ideas & thoughts and can never sit still for too long.

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The sound of silence 10/1/22

This morning i got  in the car to go to the gym,i turned on the ignition and the radio started playing and  the song that played was the Sound of Silence. Those who know me are aware that I lost my hearing overnight somewhere in the beginning of the pandemic, I went to bed hearing and woke up to silence, well almost silence, the tinuutis that was bothering me for several days was still there. In the beginning of my hearing loss journey this song would make me cry, cry for the silence, cry from understanding I will not be able to hear again , cry from the need to adapt to a new reality that I did not choose for myself.

Silence has a sound, even quietness has a sound. When I wake up every morning before I put my hearing aids in, the world is silent, kinda, since as the song goes silence does have a sound.

Somedays the silence is difficult, it reminds me of what i can’t anymore and what will never be my normal again, what i have lost and what i will miss in the future. Other times the silence is welcomed. The world is a very noisy place. All this noise causes listening fatigue as hearing with hearing aids is not easy on the brain, it requires extra work and some days my head hurts like no tomorrow. These days the hearing aids are  removed the instant I enter the car and the silence in the car is just what I need.